Motherhood - by Nuramima

All of us grow up and fall in love and then the next logical thing will be to get married.

And Allah has made for you your mates of your own nature, and made for you, out of them, sons and daughters and grandchildren, and provided for you sustenance of the best." [Noble Quran 16:72]

When all the stressful preparation and fanciful wedding is over, we lay in bed and plan out what is next for the marriage. When I got married at the age of 28, I was still skeptical about building a family right away. Of course I love my husband and would like to spend the rest of my life with him. Having a family of our own was indeed in our cards but just like the wedding, we wanted iit (having children) to be perfect.

However, being humans, the idea of carrying the responsibility being a parent do scare us. We question if we can provide for the child more than just financially. Some of us wait till we have our own houses before planning for a child. Some wait till they are more settled in a new work environment. Some prefer to have some time with the other half before thinking about children.

Toying with the idea didn’t help. Going back and forth with questions still did not give us the answers we needed. There was no correct indication or ideal time to have children. That was when we decided we were not going to plan. Allah S.W.T was the best planner.

So we carried on with the plan of not having a plan and Alhamdulillah 4 months after my wedding own wedding, I was carrying a little one in my womb. It was so surreal. I felt like a woman (I do not know why that feeling) and doing my most humble duty as a wife. I did not think what was going to happen to my career after I plan to have my child. The only concern was my health and the child who was depending entirely on me for survival.

36 weeks and 4 days later in 2011, though a little premature theoretically, I gave birth to a beautiful daughter. Tears flowed when I heard my little girl crying. It’s true that all mothers forget their pain the moment the baby is out. It was so surreal that my daughter was a gift from Allah S.W.T.

Motherhood is definitely one of the greatest gift from Allah S.W.T that only women get to enjoy. At the age of 29, I suddenly feel myself growing up and maturing. When I held my daughter in my arms, look at her tiny feet and fingers, I realized this tiny one only has her parents to protect her. No one can ever love this tiny being like her parents can.

I get very excited when I read or hear any of our muslim sisters getting married because they will insya allah get to enjoy what I enjoy. The journey of motherhood.

Having a baby definitely has it challenges. They do not understand when mummy needs to rest. They do not think much about the fact that mummy still needs to shower, eat and have a little me-time of her own. They are clueless about such things! But a mother always proves her resilience – successfully!

Many say that we will only understand our mothers when we become one someday. That is really true. You understand it the moment you little one let out her first cry.

Today, I am blessed with two children, Alhamdulillah. The challenges still remains, if not more.
I am a working mother and nothing makes me happier than opening the door and see my children squealing and screaming each time they see me. It takes away all the exhaustion and stress. Nothing beats the gift of being able to extend out your arms and receive them, kiss them and give them a huge hug.

Of course my mind is constantly thinking about when is their next diaper change, their next bottle, if they had drink enough water, if they are feeling hungry, if they feel like going out and play, if they are feeling a little unwell.

Mothers never rest but there is always a sense of contentment when you tuck the children to bed and watch over the peaceful faces.

So if you happen to know sisters who happen to fear a little about the unknown of motherhood, share with them this story. The unknown will always remain as it is. Different mothers walk through a different journey but they can rest assured that they are never alone. Many still ask me how I do it with two little active children and I say, “We are just born to be able to handle this.”

Motherhood. It is indeed a priceless gift.

With much love and two thumbs-up,
Nuramima Ram

Twitter/Instagram: @nuramima